Hey weddit! FH and I just went to BB&B this past weekend to register so I thought I would share my experience here for anyone interested.

Our Situation: We are in our late twenties, have been living on our own (out of college) for 6 years and have been living together for over a year. I had already started a small Amazon registry but we decided to also do a physical store for guests that would prefer that. And we decided BB&B was the most universally accessible physical store to both of our families.

Our Wedding: We live in the US (ref: BB&B). We are inviting about 200 people to our wedding (anticipating a turnout of about 150). I have no idea where or when my bridal shower will be yet. I told my MOH that I didn't need one, but she insisted.

The rundown: This wasn't for one of those huge registry events that BB&B has every now and then, it was just a regular appointment. We had a 4pm appointment and showed up almost on the nose. The email confirmations I received were not very specific on where/whom to check in with so I just went to the customer service desk and then that guy directed us to the back of the store where the fine china/place settings were etc. There was also a registry desk there.

So we show up to the desk, no one is manning it, but there are two apparent consultants in the immediate area helping out two other couples (separately). So I approach one lady and say we have an appointment for a registry. She replies that she is with someone else but she will try to locate our consultant. So she and the other consultant in the area are now at the desk standing in front of me like, totally confused saying "Where is Sarah," "We need Sarah at the desk"... After a few minutes of this bewilderment the lady that I initially approach says (not directly to me or anyone) that she will get us started and then our consultant will pick up with us once she gets there (Spoiler: Sarah never showed up). So she asks for my name, then enters it in the computer, looks confused and asks/tells me "So you haven't got anything started, because I cannot find you in the system". I get worried for a second that she means they can't even find record of my appointment, but then realize she just means have I started an online registry/account with them. So I reply "No, I haven't done anything yet." So then we have to spend a few minutes of her taking my info and setting up our account.

She then starts in on the meat of it. She asks how many guests we are going to have. I reply "Well, we are inviting about 200." I wanted to give that figure instead of the anticipated number of guests since I figured there will be some people who cannot attend who will still want to give a gift. So she then explains that in order to give everyone a good selection of gifts to give that we should aim for about 2-3 gifts for every invite that we send. (I am now realizing that this probably means 2 gifts per family/couple/single person unit. However, she did not explain that and had me thinking that I needed to register for 400+ things). I looked shocked and was like "I don't even think I could pick out that many things!" and the woman was just like "Oh you'd be surprised!" But no, honestly I don't think I can pick out that many things. But she went on an on about how generous people will be and that they will all want to give us more than one thing (one gift at the shower, one gift at the wedding etc etc etc).

Anyway, so she then asks us what kind of things we are excited about putting on our registry (lmao). So we kind of shrug and say "plates, towels, flatware." <---- these are all things that FH and I have decided we could definitely use to upgrade our current "collection." So she then starts a little tour around the china and flatware area telling us a little bit about each collection. Tbh I felt very rushed to make a decision there on the spot. I don't really regret the selections we made, but I just didn't like that feeling, particularly as someone with indecision problems.

She also pointed out some things on the various displays that they obviously try to peddle to every couple (a cheese board with knives set) and also told us very matter-of-factly that we need to register for toasting flutes, a picture frame that has 2 windows (one for our wedding pic and the other for our invite), and some Waterford paraphernalia. When I kind of scoffed at the picture frame & Waterford suggestions she was just like "people are going to want to buy you "pretty" and so you should let them!" (she also tried to convince me that I needed the flatware set that came with the meat fork and slotted serving spoon even after I made a sarcastic joke about only needing it after I become Martha Stewart; "You never know!!" and she at one point told us that this is our only chance to have people give us all this stuff "for free").

She continued to walk around with us also to the pots/pans section and to the towels sections. I felt pretty uncomfortable picking stuff out with her there and she was not super helpful or knowledgeable about the products outside of the "registry floor area" (aka the china and flatware). We picked out some towels with her there, but those I do kind of regret or at least am second guessing and wish I had taken more time to explore all the options. I may go back on my own to do this and then just adjust the selections online at home.

She finally left us after about an hour. By which point FH and I were exhausted and over it. And FH was getting obviously grumpy and hungry. We left and ended up with only 38 items on our list (and this includes 12 sets of the plate settings). I'm sure we will add more online later. As we were driving home I actually felt closer to not wanting to have a registry at all.

Overall Review/Tips: I think a BB&B registry is fine. Can you get most of the things they have on Amazon for cheaper? Yes, absolutely you can. But whatever, I will more than likely have the bulk of our items on the Amazon one and just keep the place settings/flatware/sheets/towels on BB&B. After having a couple days to decompress from the experience and get the somewhat sour taste that the consultant left in my mouth out, I've come back around to my original line of thinking and am OK with having this registry. My main tips:

1. Make your account ahead of time so you don't have to waste your appointment time doing that.

2. If you are like me, tell your consultant to "get lost" sooner rather than later (in a nice way). I wish I had politely asked her to leave us alone as soon as we were done with the plates/flatware.

We received a duplicate item after all was said and done so we used the prepackaged slip and mailed it back to Bed Bath & Beyond. A few weeks went by and we realized we hadn't seen our merchandise credit. So we called. Then we discovered that they have an inane policy. The default is to return the value of the gift to the original purchaser. The only way to get around this is to call them, tell them you're shipping it back, and have them mark it in the system. As you can imagine we thought that was nuts (and didn't know about it until after the fact). We explained to them how poorly explained that process is, how awful it makes newlyweds look to guests if the monetary value gets put back on their card, etc. Not to mention the ensuing family drama if this happens to be a gift bought by a family member who would not be likely to take it well.

Now I commend BBB for making it right with us. However, the woman I spoke to recommended I make it known that this is an absurd policy and that nothing other than a true gift receipt should ever be placed in boxes sent off the wedding registry to the registered couple (she agreed!). So I wanted to post on weddit to both warn soon to be newlyweds and recommend people provide feedback about this moronic policy. The place to do so is here: https://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/selfservice/ContactUs

Keep in mind, things are much smoother if you return in person. This is for mail in returns only.