Hi everyone! I'm looking for some help with a humorous gift for my boyfriend. There's a pretty big age gap between us (I'm 34, he's 46), and we love teasing each other about it—it's kind of our inside joke!
For fun, I want to put together a "Old Man Starter Kit" gift box for him. So far, I've thought about including a glasses chain and a pill organizer, but I'm struggling to come up with more ideas for items typically associated with older people.
Does anyone have suggestions for other fun, lighthearted "old man" objects to include? Thanks in advance!
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My dad is turning 70 in a little over a month, and I have no idea what to get him. When my mom turned 70 this past April, I got her a customized sweatshirt and mug, plus an orchid. My dad was really jealous that I put so much "thought" into her present. He doesn't actually want those things, but he wants the same amount of effort. Note: I'd forgotten about her birthday until the last minute and hastily pulled those things together, so little effort was involved.
My dad is really hard to shop for because he has money and is picky. When I buy him something thoughtful, he returns it and uses the credit for something else. For example, I bought him security cameras for inside the house. He returned them and got the next model up. Got him a snowblower since he struggled to shovel the sidewalk. Returned that too.
Someone had suggested a "70 things I love about you" poster. I love him, but not in 70 different ways. I can't bring myself to get something sentimental because it would be insincere and feel wrong. He's not a nice person. He's a bigot, racist, homophobic, lewd, and a big baby. You can probably sense from my tone that I've spent a lifetime trying to live up to his expectations while trying to love and respect someone who is the polar opposite of me.
He's allergic to every smell including unscented and fragrance-free products. He doesn't drink or smoke and doesn't like to travel or walk much. He spends his days going to and from doctor/dentist appointments or the casino. He likes chocolate but is a diabetic with high cholesterol, kidney disease, and gout.
The only present that I've gotten him that he liked was a massage gift certificate. But I can't give that to him EVERY time.
If I don't give him something equally thoughtful as my mom's present, then he'll hold a grudge for a while, and my mom will have to endure his incessant rants. For reference, he was in the Navy, so any significant military-related gifts might work, but I have no idea what to do for that. So any suggestions are appreciated.